REST

"And He said, 'My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.'" Exodus 33:14

This passage was spoken over us at our church's New Year's Eve watch service. I clung to it's promise, longing for rest from the fostering journey we were in. Today marks one week of that promised rest and I am cherishing it.

Many people talk about how hard fostering is because of how attached you get to the child and how hard it is to say goodbye. But sometimes you don't get attached. Sometimes you pray for the day you get to say goodbye. And that feels far worse. Our foster daughter (age 10) is a sweet, kind girl who desperately wants to belong. But no matter how much I begged and pleaded with God to soften my heart, to change us, she just never seemed to fit. Maybe it was something about her (it was) or maybe there's something wrong with us (there is). But it's also a symptom of families, systems, and a world that is broken. We did our best to love her in word and deed, even if not always with our emotions. We brought her into our home, our lives, our family, our community. We cared for her. She was loved well by our amazing extended and church families.

And now she is home with dad.

We rejoice in a family reunified. Our end goal for fostering is always reunification.

We pray for her-that her time with us will be a blessing and strength in her life and that the God of all grace will protect her and be with her always.

And we take a deep breath and rest.